Day 118 - Confused

Do you ever feel spiritually confused? I do! I may be firmly planted in my faith but I still get quite confused about things. I have felt like God was pointing me in a certain direction for a specific reason, but when I went that way it turned up nothing. I have to ask myself if I just made all of that up in my head. I would have to say that has happened more than once over the last few months. Or I feel like God has revealed plans for me but even if I pray for it or seek out ways to get there, nothing happens. It makes me frustrated and leaves me wondering once again if I made it all up.

I know that diving deeper into my faith brings out a lot more questions, a lot more looking around, a lot more prayer and a lot more soul searching. I also feel like I am learning to listen for God in my life and see the ways he will point me in a certain direction, sometimes I am right and sometimes I am wrong. Sometimes that means weeding out my own fears, wants or needs to see if it's really just me talking. I have to remember that God develops us slowly and that we cannot base our faith on what it appears that He is doing. Our faith needs to be based on who God is because we cannot always comprehend what He is doing or why He makes certain decisions. He still very well may have sent me in a certain direction but for a different reason than I had perceived.

Confusing or not, I am happy to be growing, learning and seeking.