Day 25 - 53 days

It has been 53 days since Mark was laid off. We were positive that he would have a job by now. Mark has done everything in his power to find something from Day 1. But still nothing.

Today I was out for a walk with the kids. It was gorgeous out and I felt overwhelmingly happy. I have felt like that a lot lately. Sure, I have some down days when I really worry about our situation, but those days are few. Those days are usually when I obsess about our checking account and paying the bills. Those times are when I lose faith that He can provide for us. Most days though I have a lot of peace. Peace that things will work out. Peace because I know that this is just a moment in our time and a page from our book. Peace that it is all happening for a reason. That we don't have bad luck, but instead this is the way things have to happen for our blessings. I have seen and heard about it a million times before and I know it can be the same for us.

We are not going to wait for something to come to us; we are going to make things happen. Mark is going to do some stuff on the side and we are thinking of starting our own venture. Of course we are still hoping that something great will come along so we can have a steady paycheck and insurance, but maybe that's not what is suppose to happen right now. We are definitely in a position to do something on our own, and we never would have put ourselves here. I think God has much bigger plans and He needed us to be in a situation where we didn't have the distractions and where we needed to be at our lowest to build ourselves up. It seems so obvious to me.

I don't know for sure what's going to happen next. Maybe a job will come along tomorrow, maybe not. All I know is that I have been blessed with a lot of work for my business, more than normal. Mark has also had a lot of people tell him they would support him if he went out on his own. So we are going to start paving the way and see what happens.

Faith is what makes the days happy. Faith is what makes you see the sunshine. Faith is what makes you move forward. Faith is what makes you see the bright side. Faith is stillness and no worries. Faith is knowing that things are in motion. Faith is being positive. Faith is peace in your heart.

I am feeling extra faithful right now. Sometimes that makes the down days even harder for me, but the good days are always good.

(For me the feeling of faith has grown from each circumstance and incident on my path. My faith is still in the understanding stages. It has been learned over time. It's okay if you don't feel it yet, just keep searching and trusting. Faith comes with growing pains. You will get there.)