Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Day 243 - God's breaks


I think Mark and I are really struggling with the feelings that we cannot seem to catch a break. A possibility arises and then it is taken away. We get our hopes up for a second and then, nope never mind. It is so frustrating. Everything is just out their on a limb and we never know which way or when it will all fall. So far, nothing has fallen our way. We are ready for this chapter in our life to be over. We would be happy to go from "financial crisis" to "just barely making it." Our whole life is in limbo. When I think like this, there is a song that reels me back in, especially this part:
And I do the best that I can
But I don't know how long I'll last.

I try to be so tough

But I'm just not strong enough.
I can't do this alone,
God I need You to hold onto me.
I try to be good enough
But I'm nothing without Your love. Savior, please, keep saving me.
-
from Savior, Please by Josh Wilson

It just reminds me that even when I feel like I can't do this anymore, God's love can get me through. He is continually saving me with every day occurrences and blessings. We have a roof over our heads, support from people who love us, food on our table and so much more. Not to mention the grace and knowledge He has given me. We may not be catching any big breaks right now, but small ones surrounded us daily.

I also love how vulnerable the lyrics are. They say that it is okay to admit that sometimes I'm not strong enough to get through this. That I cannot do it alone. That I can lean on God and he will see me through. I feel like this all the time. Let's face it; to get through major chapters in life, you cannot do it alone. We all need to be saved in some way. I'm thankful for all the ways God has saved us over the last nine months and I will try and focus on that when I feel like we cannot catch a break. I will take each day one at a time.



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