Day 163 - Make the decision

People tell me all the time how great I am doing and how good my attitude is despite our circumstances and I am really proud of that. I am proud of the woman I am becoming. I am proud of the choices I am making. I am the most proud of how much my faith has grown in God and in myself. I am choosing to live a different kind of life and even though I have a long way to go, I want to get there. But, never take my attitude as any thing other than that I am trying. That's all this blog is, me trying every day to have faith, no matter what the day brings. Do I succeed every day? No. I have doubts, I have a lot of fears and I have a lot of sadness. I doubt my faith when things seem unbearable and I am constantly afraid that things will get worse and never get better. I cry a lot out of frustration and sorrow, but then the clouds usually part and I center myself again and I get back into the game. I make the decision every day to have faith that this is all part of the plan. I make the decision to have faith every time an extra curveball is thrown at us. That is what faith is, it's the decision to believe, hope and trust that every day is in the details of God's plan and to fight hard for it. It takes you and God to get there. So the next time the clouds cover your sunshine, make the decision to have faith that you are exactly where you are supposed to be and I will be doing the same thing. Just don't give up.